Bend Marriage Coaching: Why Empty Nesters Should Branch Out

When your kids move out, something strange may happen. For the first time in a long time, nothing is happening. You don’t have to constantly run around doing errands to maintain a house full of children. You actually have (gasp!) peace and quiet in your house.

And it’s awful!

Often, while our kids are growing up, we lose touch with friends because there’s just too much going on or we feel worn down by the responsibilities of being a parent. Our spouse becomes our best – and in some cases, only – friend. But with your kids out of the picture, spending every minute with your spouse in your home can cause both of you to get a little stir-crazy.

What do you do? Learn from your kids.

When your children leave for college or for a new job, they have the daunting task of making new friends, joining clubs, partaking in new activities, and expanding their comfort zone. In other words, they have to branch out. So why don’t you follow their example?

Remember your life before children? Going out, making new friends, and learning new things – all while enjoying the fun of being a newlywed. Well, now you have the opportunity to experience that type of excitement again!

Okay, no one is saying this is easy. Chances are, you may feel a little rusty. Trying new activities and attempting to meet friends is a lot like dating. You have to leave your comfort zone and make yourself emotionally vulnerable.

Here’s the good news, though. You’re not alone. The wonderful thing about being in a relationship with so much freedom is that you can branch out on your own or together.

It might be nice sometimes to meet your own friends or take up a hobby that gives you some alone time. However, if you and your spouse find a class, excursion, or club that sparks both of your interests, you can attend together, too! And having something new to talk about is a great way to spark conversation during quiet moments at home.

Consider the following ways to branch out:

  • Join a neighborhood book club.
  • Start attending weekly fitness classes at your local gym.
  • Take a class at the community college.
  • Volunteer for your favorite cause.
  • Take a cruise or bus tour geared for couples your age.

Learning new skills and making new friends will allow you to grow, expand your horizons, and seek out new adventures. Enjoy this growth independently, or grow together as a team with your spouse.

If you and your spouse would like more ideas for branching out and living in an empty nest, Bend marriage coaching can help.